Even if a couple is going through a divorce, if they have kids it is important to not let their issues affect their parenting. Developing a parenting plan is an important part of raising the children as a cohesive unit.
A plan is a written agreement that defines details about schedules, decision making, communication, the child’s activities and conflict-resolution strategies.
Dimensions of a parenting plan
It may seem like a daunting task to outline a parenting plan. According to Psychology Today, the best way to start is to consider what the child needs, especially in regard to the relationship with each parent. Other factors include the age of the child, the child’s school and activity schedule, parents’ schedules, location of each parent’s homes and any of the child’s special needs.
Parents may want to focus on time dimensions and decision-making dimensions. Time aspects include the number of overnight stays with each parent, activity time spent with each parent and caretaking time with each parent. Aspects regarding decisions should include both major and day-to-day decisions.
Along with figuring out routine schedules, the parenting plan should include details about holidays and school breaks. There should also be a time period for the current plan so that parents can make amendments if necessary.
Things to avoid as co-parents
Having a parenting plan helps improve communication regarding daily schedules, but it does not ensure an easy time. According to Healthline Parenthood, parents should avoid certain behaviors as co-parents. These include not talking negatively about the other parent, not relying on the child to spy on the other, not expecting the child to take sides and making decisions out of anger.
It is also important for parents to follow the parenting plan and be consistent. Children respond better to routines, and parents need to respect their agreement as to what is best for the child.
